There are five sentences that I hate the most. It causes my jaw to clench, my blood to boil, and my anger tachometer going from 0 to 10, Ramadhan or not.
There are words that people don't want to hear. For example, one of my friends hate it when people use the word "Sabarlah..." It's not the act of being patient that rubs her the wrong way, but the notion it gives, that you are not patient at all and need to be told to be patient; or the notion that the person writing it or saying it doesn't have anything to say but still thinks he or she has to say something.
Another one of my friends hates it when people said, "You're so good at doing this. Anybody would be lucky to marry you...". It's not that the compliment angers her, but the fact that she has been told that again and again and again and yet she was single that made it irksome (she's getting married now, FYI, so your loss, mankind).
I have my own taboo statements as well. These are the things that would usually spark that kettle whistle in my brain, and I will tell you why.
a) "Penulis ni mesti banyak berangan, kan?"
("There must be a load of daydreaming involved in being a writer, eyh?")
Oh, I'm sorry. I don't know that I don't need any education to be a writer. All I need to do is staring dreamily into space and think about rich guys who would do everything he can to be with me, right?
It annoys me so much that people still has that notion that THAT what writers do. We're not all E.L. James, man. Some of us spent years of research before writing something. We listen to people's stories, we spend time writing the right words, finding the right plot, and sending messages to people. You must be mistaken 'daydreaming' with 'great scope of imagination'. Great scope of imagination? That we have. Drooling by the window thinking about being swept off your feet by rich dude riding a horse? That we don't do.
And really, male writers rarely get these kinds of comments. It mostly female writers. Is it because we mostly write romance novels, that some idiots think all we do is think about being saved by six-pack billionaire adonis?
b) "Kau ni kena selalu banyak keluar jumpa orang."
("You have to go out and meet people.")
You know, 'meeting people' has a lot of connotations. If you mean, going out and socialise with people, I do that sometimes. Do I always do that? No. Why? Because I have work sometimes. And socialising drains my energy. I hate to explain to people about extroversion vs. introversion, because it's lame. But if you mean 'meeting a lot of guys', meeeh.
But the thing is, 'selalu banyak keluar' is not the answer for life's question. In my late twenties, I do that a lot. I go out, I take vacations, I meet new people, I network. But truth be told, I get tired of doing it, of being somebody that I am not. Nowadays, I manage my time better, get to know and be friends with quality people. Meeting readers, that's more fun.
c) "Ala, makan jela ubat..."
("just take some pills...")
I've talked about this in my previous post about migraines. I don't get angry when people ask me to just take my med when it's only flu or things like that. When I get migraines, though, that's another story.
It's the insensitivity that I hate, the kind of words people say when they think you're being a baby. Whenever people say that to me, I would always imagine filling their head with rocks and then shake it like a cocktail shaker. "See? Now, tell yourself 'makan jela ubat'..." I would say.
Sigh. That would be an awesome thing to do to people.
d) "Ala, kau kerja kat rumah je kot..."
("You're only working from home...")
Let me tell you why I hate hearing that. You know how teachers hate it when people say, "How hard can it be?", or when doctors were told "Doctors only want people to get vaccines for their own profit!" or when an interior designer being told, "Pfft, even I can do this job!"
That's the thing. Respect people's job, people!
Yes, unlike others, I am more fortunate to be able to work at home and avoid traffic congestion. But it doesn't mean that I have all the time for other things. I can't just go wherever you want me to go without prior notice. I am not a businessman... okay, a service is also a kind of business, but what I mean is I don't create work. I work for others. I work for several companies, I have deadlines, I have projects. I may be working in my PJs, but I am a professional when it comes to my work. I don't take vacations sesuka hati without informing my bosses, and I don't take vacations sesuka hati without thinking the consequences to my monthly pay.
I have a very unstable income, if you want to know. It depends on how much work I do daily (that's why I would suggest ministers being paid like a freelancer. Then a lot of things are done faster and better). I am also expendable. What does that mean, you ask? It means that if I don't do my job well, there are thousands of freelancers or would be freelancers waiting to do my job. You know how many people ask me how to do what I do on daily basis?
I never questioned your work, why would you question mine?
e) "Yela, kau jela yang betul..."
Nope. If you want to have a debate with me, then come at me with facts, son. And be ready to listen to my opinion. If you're just trying to spew your ideology all over the place with no facts, then be ready to get schooled. I can listen to your crap, so listen to mine.
Anyway... what's your taboo sentence?
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