Notisbod notis:




Pembelian karya-karya Nurul Syahida kini boleh didapati di www.arrazi.my secara online. Setiap pembelian membolehkan anda mendapat tandatangan dan ucapan khas penulis.

Layari: arrazi.my atau;
Hubungi: 019-2254910 (Abg Long) atau;
Email: sales@arrazi.my

Monday, September 19, 2016

AWAK SUNGGUH PERFECT - the novel that caused it all...

Oh my God, guys. I am so sorry for forgetting about the blog. I had been busy with work (ada projek translation 30 episod yang telah menyebabkan aku tak bercuti raya dengan aman dan cam, "What? Dah September?"). As soon as I was able to take a breather, I was told that buku baru dah masuk (dan keluar) printer.

Soooo....


Panjang cerita kelahiran buku ni. Asalnya aku nak tarik balik sebab aku nak start projek baru dan aku tak nak ada something looming inside my mind. So I wrote my editor an email untuk officially take the manuscript back, but then Encik Ali email me back saying "permohonan awak untuk tarik balik ditolak."

I was like, What? How can you reject me taking back my manuscript???? But then I decided, o well, let's just see the editor to explain the situation, because he was of the idea that I was trying to send it to other publishers.

(here's the thing, sending my book to another publisher is never something that I had thought about. I would have done that ages ago when I was approached by some of the newer publishers during my PLAIN JANE years. the truth is, I am so comfortable with Karangkraf since I've started with them that changing my publisher is not ideal).

So I explain to him that I plan to stop writing for now sebab aku dah kehabisan idea (at least idea yang publishable. Idea yang merapu dan tak publishable memang banyak) dan the book industry is at its low sekarang since GST and kebanjiran novel dan publisher baru. I wanted my mss back sebab kalau tak dapat publish tahun ni, banyak yang I have to change since there are dates, songs based on those dates, dan event backdrop yang berkaitan the dates. I thought that if diorang taknak publish, then it's better that I take it back so that I can start anew with my project.

Ramai sangka aku merajuk, except my former AKU KAN NOVELIS editor Ecah, who totally understood where I was coming from. She was like, "Yelah, mestilah nak tarik balik kalau nak berhenti kan, supaya tak ada benda tu dalam fikiran". Oh my God, I thank You for Ecah.

So anyway, they decided to put my book in the schedule dan keluarkan tahun ni bulan Julai. And then somehow, tak jadi and delay sampai Oktober. Me being the pessimist who would think worse, decided untuk tak promote langsung before September, sebab aside from busy dengan kerja, I thought it would get delayed again. Tup-tup in early September ALAF keluar gamba kata dah print.

I was like, "What? But I haven't done anything!!!" and cecepat study camna nak guna photoshop (sebab akak yang dah tua ni dah malas nak belajar teknologi zaman sekarang).

So, for now, here's the details: the book is called AWAK SUNGGUH PERFECT, dan dipublish under banner ALAF 21 (kenapa? Sebab skrg Buku Prima fokus only on seram dan thriller.. or something like that). Untuk pembelian, mohon berikan maklumat seperti dibawah bagi urusan pos:
1. Nama Penuh.
2. Alamat Lengkap dan Poskod.
3. Nombor hp.
4. Nama yang mahu dicatitkan dalam buku.
Harga: RM27 + RM6 Kos POS LAJU.
Pembayaran melalui Maybank atas nama: Mohamad Feroz Bin Mohammad Zaini.
Nombor akaun - 112045101747.
Boleh kirimkan maklumat diatas samada melalui PM, sms atau whatsApp ke nombor 019 2254910 (Abang Long)

Setiap pembelian (for now) akan dapat:

sementara stok masih ada


Friday, May 13, 2016

Butterflies and Hurricanes

Today, I took back my manuscript from the publisher. And there had been speculations about why I did it. Some insinuated that I 'merajuk'. Some said that I got an offer from someplace else. Some even think that it has anything to do with royalty and publishing politics.

Sigh. People and speculations. 

So here's why.

I sent my manuscript on 11 April 2015. It was inspired by my (then still alive) cats, Mugabe, A'a, and Kimon (that's all I can say). In January 2016, I asked my editor about it, and he said that they have slotted in for April (as in for editing, not for release). April came and gone. By 11 May 2016, I asked him again, and then he told me.

There were some changes. Big changes. Not sure my manuscript will get to be released this year. So I asked him if I can take it back. He referred me to another editor. 

The second editor asked me why, and if I didn't want to write with Buku Prima again. I said that wasn't the case at all. It wasn't about money, about who gets what slot, merajuk and all that. Okay, so partly it is about the money, since I am 33. Let's be real. I am not writing for the fun of it. I write so I can eat and pay my bills. If I die today, I have nothing except for some cash in the bank, THAT's how dirt poor I am. So, it would be hypocritical for me to say that I am writing for the love of it. That shit ain't real. Girl gotta live.

Glad that's over with (I just get sick and tired with people trying to beautify the reality of life as a writer with words such as 'dream', 'passion', 'money don't matter' bladibla.... yeah, if you're 20. Try being a single woman at 33 working freelance. You got no time for that fable anymore).

Anyway. If you read my blog dated February, you would have already knew that I am burnt out as a writer. (Read the rest of the post because I am done talking about it and explaining it). It felt like I am doing the same thing over and over again. And I am Nurul Syahida. I don't do the same things over and over again. I used to quit my job with no plan at all. I invest in a business that goes nowhere, and then got entangled in a long court battle. That's how I roll (or Roul, if you catch my drift). I took a leap of faith, and more often than not, I failed. But failure, as much as success, is intoxicating. It even gets me closer to the Maker. 

But right now, I am at a point of my life that I am neither successful nor failed. I am at a static place, a place of comfort, where dreams die and passion goes to hell. I used to think at 30 I will migrate to Australia, selling karipap or kites at the beach. Living life. But where I am right now? At home, doing God knows what.

Don't get me wrong, I don't have what people called 'the writer's dream'. I don't dream of having my book on the bestseller's list for the rest of eternity. I don't dream of seeing it on the big screen (or the small screen for that matter). I don't dream about socialising with celebrities, becoming popular, becoming stinking rich that I can own my own island. My dream is simple. My dream is to become better. Better doesn't come with wealth and fame (having enough money to die and not worry about the family is enough). Better comes with growth.

When my editor told me about the big change in the company, I took it as a sign. The industry is at its balanced best/worst situation, people are getting skeptical about books, I keep on defending writers and books from naysayers than actually writing. I am already burned out from writing the same old thing. And here's my editor, telling me in a nutshell that the sales of my previous books are not putting me in the VIP section. I am a pariah, waiting for some accident in the schedules for my book to squeeze into. 

These are all signs. These are all reasons for me to try that leap of faith again. To do the things I always wanted to do but too afraid to do it for fear of losing what I already have. Now that I am losing what I already have, I have become scared. But it's a good scared. It's crazy "Shai is doing things with no Plan B" scared.

In short, I just want 60 year-old me (if I was still alive, that is. God knows who is holding the red button to the nuclear bombs right now, or if I am even alive next month) to know that I've tried. I want her to know that I took that leap, and that at the age of 60 (or 70 or whatever), I knew that the younger me didn't waste her time living in a comfort zone. That she tried. Succeeding or failing are not the measure here, but the mere fact that she wanted something and she tried getting it.

I owe that much to myself. 

So, what 'leap of faith' am I talking about? Pfft, like I'm gonna tell you that.

And for that manuscript, I don't know. I am still thinking about it. I may do some editing to suit the dates (it was written with the idea that everything ended in 2015 because it was the date I sent it, but now I have to change everything. And I mean everything!). I may publish it into a book, or I may just publish the content into my blog. I can't be selfish. I have readers, even if there isn't a lot of them.

But right now, I am high on that leaping energy. I am gonna go berserk for the rest of the year (questioning why am I doing this stupid crazy thing when I have something good going on, hitting my head on the table going "This is shit! This is shit!", and lie on the floor thinking about the purpose of life... oh yes, I am expecting all those things), but right now, that's all I want.
  
The randomness.


I am Frogger, the scaredy-cat amphibian who jumps across the busy street. 

Wednesday, March 23, 2016

Caring too much emotionally, and couldn't care less physically. Otherwise known as emotional laziness.

I think I am having a middle-age crisis at 32 (going on 33 in a month. Yay!).

So if you're having that crisis at age 32, can you call it middle-age crisis? Or should it have its own name? Like, semi-middle age crisis, or post-20s crisis, or stupid-shit-women-in-their-30s-have-after-annoying-people-with-their-problem-when-they-were-in-their-20s?

Or should I just call it "The Inexplicable Syndrome of Annoyance Exclusively Facing Nurul Syahida Kamarudin and The People Who Think Like Her"?

Here are my symptoms:
1. Being annoyed with the situation of the situation around her but not being able to say anything about it because the situation involves people who may be her friends and/or colleagues.
2. Being annoyed by the helplessness of her aforementioned situation and yet doesn't even have any desire to change it.
3. Annoyed with her apparent laziness in trying to make any effort to change a thing she hopes can change, and being all, "Why should I change it? Why can't I just express my annoyance with it and let other people do something about it instead?"
4. Wanting to make an effort to save herself from the quicksand that is slowly engulfing her soul, and at the same time just wanting someone to come save her because she is sick of saving herself.
5. Hating the thought of being the kind of woman she hates, when she said she wants to be saved.
6. Understanding that her actual issue stems from the fact that she cares too much both emotionally and mentally, and yet couldn't care less physically. Like for example, "I care about my friend A and I would like to talk to her sometimes. And yet, I am too lazy to pick up the phone."
7. Bored by the status-quo and yet not interested to move forward.

I think the root of this issue is the fact that I am not able to express the anger I have with it publicly, to say what I really want to say. I think that's the same issue some politicians have. They may start wide-eyed and ambitious, looking at the system through the lens of justice, and then finding themselves slowly being dragged into the dirt by other politicians, who, ironically, started off as a wide-eyed ambitious person who wants to do good in the world as well.

Like a faeces-infested circle of life.

It's the feeling of being trapped inside this stupidity, the kind of stupidity where you just kinda point at it while talking to your friend and asked them "Can't you see how stupid this is?" and your friend said, "Not that I can see", and you're like, "Oh my God this is so stupid. I can't express it with direct words and yet nobody seemed to understand metaphors, so how am I supposed to do this?", and finally realising that I can't get away from it unless I break free, and yet I am too lazy to do it.

Is this because I am Malay? Or because I am an introvert? Or because I was never wired to be a person who can uphold social justice? Or is it just because I am just too lazy?

I think it's the last one.


Monday, February 15, 2016

Burnt

Mungkin agaknya sudah penat.

Atau mungkin sebab aku rasa tak fresh lagi.





Aku ada niat nak berhenti menulis buat seketika. Insya-Allah lepas ini, lepas buku baru aku keluar (tatau la bila, tapi dalam tahun ni la, kata editor), aku nak berhenti menulis sekejap. Sekejap tu aku tak tahu sampai bila. Mungkin dua tiga tahun. Mungkin lebih cepat, atau mungkin lebih lama.

Bukan sebab aku kering idea. Dalam otak aku ada banyak idea. Macam-macam. Inside, outside, tepi, tengah, belakang, bawah box sume ada.

Tapi sebab aku rasa tak fresh. Dulu bila menulis, aku rasa seronok. Aku seronok share idea, aku seronok do all those "jengjengjeng...TWIST!" kind of thing. Tapi sejak akhir-akhir ni, twist feels stale. The industry itself feels stale to me. It was the same thing. Tulis. Edit. Publish. Jual. Sign buku. Baca review. Somehow amid all that, aku dah lupa keseronokannya.

Mungkin sebab dulu, masa aku menulis, aku fikir nak bagi orang terhibur dengan apa yang aku tulis, to make them feel that they're not alone in whatever it is they are going through. There was no need to compete, to make sure buku tu terjual dengan banyak, there was no need to worry about the economy, about TV adaptations, what else I should do to sell my craft. But the more you grow, the older you get, writing a book is no longer just for the sake of writing stories. It's about sales, it's about survival, it's about entering a world where there is competition all around. And in order to survive, you have to wear white in the sea of white.

Somehow, cita-cita aku yang dulunya "penulis novel yang ada kerja sampingan lain" dah bertukar. Kerja sampingan yang lain tu dah jadi kerja tetap, dan menulis novel dah jadi sampingan sebab I need to live and writing a book just doesn't cut it. It doesn't pay the bills. I used to not care about the money, and cherish the excitement of telling stories. But even telling stories doesn't excite me anymore.

I will find my way. I will make my return. Maybe sooner than anybody expected. But for now, aku nak berenti sekejap. Aku dah 32 tahun. Aku perlu ada hala tuju. I am sick of the same love story. Kalau tak, aku akan continue spewing the same thing over and over again because the market is like that, and my readers will just say, "She's burnt out".

Aku berborak dengan seorang fellow writer yang juga dah mula rasa bosan menulis, yang nak tulis sesuatu yang lebih daripada apa yang dia biasa tulis. Tapi katanya it's like trying to do a stand-up comedy dalam Maharaja Lawak. You can make the funniest commentary about the socio-political situation of the world, but in the end orang gelak gila tengok pelawak yang pakai baju perempuan.

Hmmm....

Monday, November 16, 2015

A Portrait of a Cat that Once Lived

2012 to 15 November 2015
(this post is dedicated to my CAT DIARY readers on Facebook. If you're not one of em, feel free to follow me at fb/nsyahidakamarudin.)

Thank you guys for your kind words about Mugabe's passing. Some people might say, "Oh, it's just a cat. Grow up!", but of course, people who say that doesn't have cats/pets, so they don't understand the bond.

Some asked me why I decided not to euthanise Mugabe when he was suffering. That's because I didn't want him to die at an unfamiliar place, a place that he hated so much when he was alive. And although a lot of articles about euthanasia mentioned that cats do not have human emotion and would not understand anything except pleasure and pain (and thus dying at any place won't matter to them), seeing him breathing his last fresh air under the tree with squirrels running around and birds chirping was a picture that I would be happy to remember him by. I am not against people who decided to euthanise their cats, because any choice you have to make for your pet is hard and people do it in the best of intention. Nobody wants to hurt their loved ones. But this was a decision that I made because it felt right. In the end of the day, YOU know your cat. Not the vet, and not other people.

And after a week of force feeding, peeing on the bed pad, needing people to clean him with wipes, spending time watching videos of birds on YouTube, being carried everywhere he needed to go, I think he is all okay now, in his own castle in kitty paradise, boasting around other kitty souls about how he was the prince of darkness in his previous life. That darn cat might be bitching about me being an asshole owner, for all I know.

Of all the cats that I had before, I am more at peace with how Mugabe went. He caught six musk shrews the week before his condition went worse, and he decided to sleep on my bed for the two days before he died. He chose the tree when he knew his time was coming, and he passed away a few seconds before the rain started to pour. He didn't live long, but I am glad he lived a full life. He was the king of the neighbourhood outside, but was an obedient pet at home.

He had always been a sick cat, and I suspected that he had always carried the virus with him since day one (before the vets even knew about it), because he never seemed to be able to get well as quickly as the others. A lot of cats carry coronavirus, but only a percent of them get FIP, and sadly, he was the one percent. Only one percent of an FIP-infected cat survived, and sadly, he wasn't one of them.

Am I not angry at the vets for not detecting it soon enough? No. The disease is not easily detectable, and even when a vet diagnosed it, it's not a "Yes, this is it" kind of thing, but more of a "We have ruled out everything, so this is the only thing left" kind of thing. And unless you did a blood test, an x-ray, a few visit to several different veterinary clinic, chances are, you won't know them too.

Isn't it a waste of money to go to several vets to get their opinion just to have your cat died in the end? No. Because now I know that his death is inevitable, and that I have tried almost everything, and ensure everything before deciding on what to do with his life.

The only thing that I regretted is that I had plans with Mugabe for my new book. I wanted to promote the new novel with him being front and centre. He will be on the free gifts that will come with the book. But he left before it even get to be realised.

I will re-start Cat's Diary soon. Thanks again, guys.

Bye bye, buddy. See you when I see you.

Friday, July 10, 2015

Ants Ants Ants

I champion black ants.

Not the thick one usually found on rambutan or mangosteen trees, but the normal domestic black ants, also known as common house ants.

I hate it when people kill those ants.

My mum is often annoyed that I wouldn't let her wash them away whenever they gathered inside a plate and steal leftovers. I'm like, "Mum, all you have to do is tap your hands on the table or the plate and they will go away in seconds!"

And why do you ask, that I like them so much?

Because they're friendlier than what comes next when they left their colony or being exterminated by pest control. You have the odorous ants, commonly known as 'semut busuk'or 'semut mayat', that don't care if you tapped the plate or the table, and will leave the terrible odour if you wipe them off the table. And they like to make nests in things that don't make any sense. Like in the cover of my favourite DVD, or my water bottle. Or God forbid, my books!

Then there's another species of ants, which is much much smaller than the odorous ants.

I hate them.

They're slow, they don't care and won't budge no matter how many times you shake the plate. And they bite. And they are so small, that sometimes you won't see them roaming around inside the carpet. Sometimes they bite you while you're asleep and all you see are red marks or bumps on your skin the next day. And they gather everywhere.

Of course, the best thing to have is no ants at all. But that is almost impossible, since we're living in a old terrace house, where there are cracks everywhere.

The existence of black ants helps minimise these other pesky ants.

A friend of mine tried exterminating all the black ants despite my telling her that she should't do so. What happens now? She has fire ants now.

Fire-friggen-ants!

Love your black ants, people!


Thursday, July 9, 2015

Workin on my night cheese.... (title unrelated to the post)

"You keep talking about work. What have you been doing exactly?"

Why, let me introduce you to the things that I have been translating for the past two months.

Disclaimer though... when a translator gets transcripts, it doesn't mean they'll get the whole thing. So, sometimes I did only five out of 35 episodes, or 20 out of 25 episodes, or sometimes even only one out of 100 episodes. The work given to me is quite random and varying. Sometimes they even get like, episodes 1-5 of drama A, then something else, then suddenly episodes 8-20 of drama A again.

I have to make that disclaimer because...... reasons....

1. BABY STEPS 2


A Japanese anime about one tennis prodigy named Maruo Eiichirou who takes notes of other player's game plan and aims to go pro.

Yes, that's the premise.

It's different from my previous work, because I have to do it not just for subtitles but also for dubbing purposes, so it's quite fun and annoying at the same time. Fun, because I have to imagine how a voice actor should sound (you don't want them to sound too formal), at the same time making sure the sentences are still up to TV standard.

2. KIRAZ MEVSIMI



Or translated to English as CHERRY SEASON, a Turkish rom-com series about an aspiring fashion designer who falls in love with her childhood friend and being romanced by her idol's hunky son, while her best friend is a backstabbing bitch who just wants the world to burn.

Okay, that was a bit over the top. But that's the whole premise. I don't really like the whole "Oh my God, I am a cutesy helpless girl who needs these two architects (and a photographer mesmerised by my inner beauty) helping me in everything" storyline, but it has quite a tongue-in-cheek dialogues that I enjoy translating in Bahasa Melayu. When a drama has a witty script, you kinda want to get creative with it.

And Istanbul looks sooo beautiful in this series, I feel like packing my bags and go there. But I'm poor. Help me, I'm poor.

3. KAMBAL SIRENA



I get that she has to play the shirtless mermaid,
but why are you unbuttoning your shirt, man?
Or FOOTSTEPS OF A MERMAID in English.... or loosely translated as "Mermaid Twins". This is a difficult one to explain. A woman marrying a merman (that's male version of a mermaid, for those who don't know), ended up being pregnant with twins.... one, turned out to be a mermaid, complete with scaly fish tails, and the other a normal girl, who has fins behind her ears. Then something happened, the mum thinks her mermaid girl died, so she moved away from the island with her normal daughter, the mermaid girl was adopted by her mermaid grandmother, they grew up, fell in love with the same man without knowing it, and I don't know the rest of the story because it's still on air.

It's quite difficult for me to translate, not because the language is hard, but because I am not much a fan of these fantastical series. Filipinos have quite a lot of them. They have Indio, Kambal Sirena, Dyesebel, Amaya, Adarna... some of them I translated, some not.

And I know for a fact they try to keep the women's attention by finding reasons for Aljur Abrenica to show of his six pack. I mean, why are you shirtless on the corridor of your workplace? That doesn't make any sense. And what's with this dream sequence where you're brooding in the ocean? Whose wet dream is this???? (I suspect the scriptwriter).

4. ADARNA



Another one of those Filipino fantastical series (I know, I keep getting them. I don't mind though, as long as I am getting paid for it). This one tells the story about this one girl, Adarna, who has a huge hump in her back that causes all the pain and suffering from all the lame mockery from people, that includes the corny "She's the Hunchback of Notre Dame", to the is-this-a-diss? chant of "Hump! Hump! Hump!"

She lives with a stepmother and stepsister who act like any stepmothers and stepsisters in fiction of yesteryears, and somehow caught the eye of a famous basketball player of whom she once healed when they were kids, because... she... has... healing... powers... from... her... hump...? (I don't know. I never saw the first few episodes). Oh, and she talks to birds.

I decline to make further comments.

5. AMAYA



How can someone be this flawless? I don't get it!
Yes, I have been translating a lot of Filipino series. This one stars Marian Rivera, also known as ugly women's worst nightmare (seriously, how can someone be that gorgeous AND have that sexy hoarse voice at the same time? It's almost ridiculous). She plays the titular character, a woman who was prophesied to kill the strongest king called Raja Mangubat.

For those of you who watches dramas for the eye candy rather than the actual storyline, well.... voila. Gorgeous women and men (who seemed unrealistic for an epic costume drama supposedly occurred before the Spanish invasion... seriously, if Marian Rivera lives in that period of time, she will not have milky white skin and flawless hair... and Pan-Asian look). The men all wear cawat and show off their bods, so I guess the gymnasiums all over Manila got quite rich during production.  And that includes Aljur Abrenica.

Man, that dude is shirtless in everything.

6. CRAZY FOR YOU



An old Filipino rom-com (not that old though, It was a hit in the Philippines in 2006) that tells a story of an FWO (Filipino Working Overseas) named Janice who works in Spain as a maid, who later works in this one Filipino guy's apartment. They kinda keep writing notes to each other without ever meeting in person, and later he fell in love with her without knowing she is his maid.

I love translating it because of its cutesy witty dialogue. Like I said, it makes a translator wants to be creative when you get creative scripts. Sadly, I was only given two of these. I would love to translate more of this show.

7. INDIO



The story takes place after AMAYA, which means during the Spanish Invasion. It tells the story of a guy who has Herculean strength who didn't know that he has been working with the evil Spanish conquistador who killed his parents ....................................... yeah, that's it.

Weirdly enough, the people in this drama looks more like what people might look like in those days than in AMAYA. Oh and Aljur Abrenica is in it again. And get this, shirtless!

Ah, Aljur. You never fail to entertain.

Thank you. I'm glad that my shirtlessness entertains people.

Monday, July 6, 2015

Breaking a Promise

Yeah, I have broke my promise not once, but three days in a row. I will be back. I promise.

Aku berjanji dengan sapa dia tah....


Friday, July 3, 2015

Waiting game

I have skipped a day despite my promise of writing daily.

Meh, it's not like I have a lot of readers pun. Ahahahaha.

But still, yesterday my stress was at all time high. A'a has been missing for five days, and I received a lot of various information about him that it was ridiculous to put it on timeline. I mean, I thank people who gave the information, as they really tried helping (and helping is better than keeping quiet).

However, according to various sources, the timeline of A'a missing will be this way
Sunday: Was seen in Sri Mahligai Section 9
A few days later: Might be dead near the junction between section 11 and 12 (I pray to God this is not it and it's just some similar looking cat)
Tuesday: He was eating at my next-door neighbour's house

So it puts A'a in three different places in the course of five days. Knowing A'a and his lack of attention span, I don't think it would be possible at all.

I have come to the conclusion that if death is not part of it, A'a must have been:

a) kidnapped
- maybe a kid was interested in him (since he was so good at bodek orang) and decided to secretly stash him inside a bag and brought him home, only to get bored after a while.
- some people say that it's illogical that anybody would kidnap a grown cat. but a few months ago, a fellow writer revealed that her cat was stolen by a neighbour who then denied that she kidnapped the cat, saying that she bought it... when it was obvious that the cat, with all his distinctive features known by his original owner, is not hers.

b) unintentional kidnapping
- I have read several instances when a cat is accidentally taken away from its home due to its habit of getting into cars/getting into boxes/getting into bags.
- I experienced this two days ago while looking for A'a. Since my cat responses to finger snapping, I continued to do it while looking for him. Then I hear a cat meowing, so I turned back thinking it was him. Instead, there were three cats who were following me. I was like, "Dude, where did you guys come from? Your owner would panic if they realise that you are missing!" Long story short, I gave them some food at home (because they have been walking with me for a while and must have been hungry), and then put them back in the neighbourhood I found them.

c) A'a just doesn't want to come home
- Maybe he just didn't want to come home and have decided to stay outside instead (this, I assume from my neighbour's statement saying he visited them on Tuesday). I told you before that A'a isn't that loyal. He's like Spongebob's Gary. Maybe he has decided that he doesn't want to be our cat anymore.
- This is not impossible. I used to have a cat called Koyon. He stayed with us for a year, and then one day decided that he wants to be an alleycat and didn't come home anymore. We will see him passing by sometimes, and sometimes he would stand in front of the door and ask for food, but he would not come in and stay like he used to.

In any case, life continues. Mum said that I should take a breather and take care of myself instead. I have done all I could in trying to find him. I have asked for assistance from the Shah Alam Residents forum, I have asked for my post to be shared on FB, I have looked for him every day, day and night.

I guess it's now a waiting game.

Wednesday, July 1, 2015

My Parents' Diplomatic Communications 101

My parents have a distinctive way of expressing themselves.

And I think it has influenced my writing a lot.

Mum, who keeps blaming her "Minangkabau blood" for her way of speaking in circles, never ask you to do anything directly.

Let's say she wants you to clean the aquarium, instead of saying, "Bersihkan akuarium!", she goes, "Kesian ikan tu berenang dalam air kotor."

No matter what my mum said or whatever reason she gave, I know for a fact that mum just doesn't want to sound like she is giving an order. She wants us to understand what she wants without needing to say it.

Which is annoying at times, to be honest. It's cute at times, but annoying the rest of it. I mean, sometimes when you want to do something quickly, you just don't have time to interpret her words. I mean, saying "Makan bihun goreng pun sedap, kan?" doesn't actually give you any information whatsoever.

What is it then? You want me to make it for you? Buy it for you? You want me to agree? You want me to buy things for bihun goreng? What is it that you want me to buy? The bihun? The shrimps? Oil? Sawi? What is it??????

My aunt Eiasah, her sister also talks the same way, and my uncle likes to make fun of it.

Last time, we were in the car returning from Sri Menanti, and she saw some stalls selling petai.
"Sedap nampak petai tu," she said.
But my uncle didn't stop.
So she asked, "Kenapa Lik tak berhenti beli petai tu?"
He replied, "Esah kata petai tu nampak sedap, tak kata nak berhenti pun."

Dad, on the other hand, never ask things in a way that shows that he wants it. He asks a question instead.

For example, "Adik nak buat air tembikai ke hari ni?"
(That's not a question. That's dad's way of saying, "Buat air tembikai".)
"Awak nak masak apa hari ni? Mee rebus?"
("Aku nak mi rebus.")
"Kaklong nak telefon Ashu ke?"
(Kaklong, telefon Ashu.")

And this stems from the fact that my dad, who has always been the go-to guy, the sole provider of the family, is not very comfortable asking anything from his children. He doesn't like being seen as the one who needed help from his kids. I mean, even when I want to give him money, he'll be like, "Adik kan tak dapat royalti lagi bulan ni. Tak payahlah."

Dad, I have at least three jobs, okay? Take the money!

And so, instead of asking for something, he rewords his requests into questions to make you believe that it's YOU who want to do all that that he asked.

And as their daughter, I find myself being influenced by them in my daily conversations, and sometimes it irks my friends.

Instead of saying, "Aku nak pergi kedai tu kejap", I say, "Kedai tu nampak macam best, kan?" (which is the mixture of my mum and my dad's way of asking for something).

**sorry, I can't continue with this for the time being. It's been four days since A'a went missing and I'm quite distraught.