SIM card aku rosak, so aku bermonolog tentang kehidupan...

Bila aku kata SIM card aku rosak, member aku cam....

"Nampak sangat ko single."

Ahahahahahahaha. Apa kaitannya? Banyak kaitannya. Hanya orang single yang sangat tenang bila SIM card rosak, fon rosak, atau apa2 hal kerosakan yang berkaitan line of communication.

Tapi it juga sangat berkaitan dengan orang yang kerja freelance-slash-novelist dari rumah macam aku (aku boleh je tulis freelancer/novelist instead of guna perkataan 'slash'.. saje menyusahkan diri).

Truth be told, I hate phones.

Aku terganggu bila dihubungi di telefon. Bila orang call aku, aku jadi blur, I say the stupidest thing that makes Snooki nampak bijak laksana (aku tak tengok "Jersey Shore" atau "Snooki & JWoww" pun untuk buat Snookie reference... which is actually a very very very old reference. I just have weird knowledge about reality shows). Apetah lagi bila aku tengah menulis. Cantik je aku punya flow, sekali tu ada bunyik lagu "Knights of Cydonia" berkumandang dengan dahsyatnya.

Hilang sume flow idea aku.

Satu lagi sebab aku tak suka mengikuti perkembangan zaman (kata seorang bekas student Political Science whose studies are more or less about the political progress of the era). Dulu aku suka tau apa nama model kereta terbaru dan main that game dalam keta with my sister where you pick a car of your choice and kira ada berapa banyak kat jalan raya and whoever pick the most, wins..... well, actually wins nothing except the right untuk berlagak.

Tapi sekarang ni terlampau banyak model kereta yang keluar, aku dah stop paying attention. Imagine playing the same game in this insufferable adult life.

"Itu Honda, kan?"
"Nope."
"How can that not be a Honda?"
"Itu Nissan Altima."
"Looks like a Honda to me."
"How can that look anything like a Honda?"

Yeppp.. I am crap at that.

Sama jugaklah macam brand telefon. A few weeks ago, telefon lama aku rosak, so I used my father's phone instead. Nad tanya aku, phone apa. Aku kata Samsung. Then dia tanya aku Samsung apa.

I don't know. Cheap Samsung?

Then Maxis hantar SMS configuration, saying "TQ, you'll receive settings for your Samsung S3850 Corby II soon..." and aku cam, Oh, so nama kau Corby... mmmkay.

Today, aku baca artikel tentang Chow Yun Fat. Chow Yun Fat is one of the highest earning stars in Hong Kong with wealth over HKD 1 billion... which is bersamaan dengan RM...... eh pi Google sendiri lah. And yet, dia pergi events naik public transport, jarang apdet baju2 yang dia ada, dan pakai henpon cikai. Why? Sebab dia kata dia boleh observe orang kalau naik public transport and people would not realise he's there at all sebab diorang sume busy tunduk tengok fon masing2. And why dia pakai fon cikai? Sebab dia suka fon cikai dia.

So I guess Fat Gor is my idol in that sense.

That brings me to the point... kenapa bila aku hidup dengan dhaif, some successful people kata, "Kau kena berubah" and bagi aku contoh-contoh orang-orang kaya yang berjaya macam Dr. Fazley atau Donald Trump sebab diorang dress and act for the job they want. And yet bila aku kata, "Christopher Nolan takde henpon", sume orang kata, "Kau mana boleh samakan diri ko dengan Christopher Nolan...."

How can you compare me to those other rich people who you think I should take as an example, but when I pick my example, ko kata tak bleh plak?

Jap, apa cerita aku tadi? Aku rasa aku dah keluar topik....

Oh well.

In reality, Fat Gor tak bakar rokok dengan duit though...